Bullied Teen Who Got Facial Plastic Surgery Ready to Forgive Tormentors, But Won’t Forget

Nadia Ilse, a teen bullied into plastic surgery - before and after

Nadia Ilse, a teen bullied into plastic surgery – before and after


Nadia Ilse, the 14-year-old Georgia girl who underwent radical facial plastic surgery after being bullied for years about her looks, said she is more confident than ever now and is ready to forgive her tormentors.

“I believe in forgiveness, but I will never forget the times that they did that, the times they made fun of me, and the times they hurt me,” she said. “You have to make them earn it.”

While most teenagers may get a new wardrobe before they head back to school in the fall, Ilse got a new face. In June, she went under the knife, getting a nose job, a chin implant and had her ears pinned back.

On her first day of ninth grade, Ilse was all smiles as she wore her hair up, showing her ears for the first time years. She even received compliments on her new look from a former bully.

The Cumming, Ga., teenager was born with bilateral lop-eared deformities on both ears, a condition where the person is missing the folds within the ear and the bowl of the ear sticks out. She said school used to be a nightmare because she was constantly taunted about her appearance.

“They said I have the biggest ears that they’ve ever seen, they called me Dumbo, elephant ears,” Ilse said. “I act like I didn’t care though I really did. It hurt a lot.”

She said the was bullying so bad that she often had to stop herself from crying in front of her tormentors.

“I tried to hold it in as much as I could, and when I got, usually when I’m walking home from the bus stop, I usually start to cry or I usually cry myself to sleep sometimes too,” she said.

The teenager tried to keep the bullying a secret from her mother, Lynda Ilse, because she said she didn’t want to burden her. Having recently been laid off, Lynda was already coping with mounting medical bills for her 9-year-old son, Josh. He has cerebral palsy and will have to undergo heart surgery soon.

To Nadia, whatever issues she was having felt superficial so she kept it to herself. When her mother did finally find out about the bullying, she said she was heartbroken.

“I didn’t realize it was that bad,” Lynda Ilse said. “She would mostly say that she has migraines.”

Nadia Ilse became convinced that the solution to ending the bullying was plastic surgery. After a year’s worth of constantly nudging, her mother agreed.

“Every family has to make their own decision,” Lynda Ilse said. “I let Nadia make the decision. She’s been begging me for so long to get her ears pinned back and so that’s what she wanted to do and so I just supported her.”

“It’s no different than somebody having teeth that require braces,” she added. “If you had teeth that stuck out, wouldn’t you go to a dentist and have braces put on?”

In fact, according to The American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, ear surgery, or otoplasty, is the most common plastic surgery procedure among teens, with over 11,000 surgeries performed last year.

Given the family’s financial constraints, Lynda Ilse turned to the Little Baby Face Foundation, a Manhattan-based organization that provides free surgeries around the world for children with facial deformities who have a financial need.

Dr. Thomas Romo, the president of the organization and the head of facial plastic surgery at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City, said Nadia Ilse’s case met the foundation’s criteria to have the corrective surgery, even though to the naked eye, her deformities may not have seemed so extreme.

“She wasn’t picked to have her surgery because she was bullied,” Dr. Romo said. “She was picked for her surgery because of her deformities and we could correct that surgically. If that helps her from getting bullied, thank you, God. No one is going to get accepted through the foundation because they don’t like the way they look.”

Nadia Ilse originally just wanted her ear pinned back, but Dr. Romo also suggested she get a chin implant to balance her face and a nose job to fix a deviated septum. In total, the teenager received $40,000 worth of surgery for free.



Dr. Brian C. Reuben says that while bullying is a serious issue affecting children of all ages, cosmetic surgery may be a solution for some of them. He performs plastic surgery in Salt Lake City, but only on patients whom he feels are emotionally and physically ready.

“While plastic surgery could help children whose physical deformities make them victims of bullying, it may not be the right answer for everyone,” Dr. Reuben says. “Bullying is a complex psychological situation, so there may be emotional and behavioral issues involved as well.”

Recent news reports (http://tiny.cc/jgmejw) tell of groups, such as the Little Baby Face Foundation, that provide free corrective surgery for eligible children and teens with facial deformities.

“I am an advocate for helping people who may not be able to afford medical care, especially when it comes to children with congenital deformities,” Dr. Reuben says. “While surgery can be an important component in minimizing bullying and boosting self-confidence, I’m glad to hear that many of these organizations also provide counseling for patients, both before and after surgery.”

He points out that regardless of a person’s age or reason for wanting cosmetic surgery, realistic expectations are as important as the surgery itself.
“This is why the consultation process is so important,” Dr. Reuben says. “I strive to create open and comfortable communication, allowing each person who visits me to develop a feeling of trust before we move ahead with surgery. It is through mutual respect and sharing expectations for surgery that patients are able to create realistic goals.”

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August 28, 2012 · webmistress · Comments Closed
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